Monday, April 20, 2009

The Alien Baby

Have I mentioned what a fantastic baby Canon was, and is? Crying always means "I'm hungry" or "I'm sleepy" . . . until The Alien Baby takes over his body. I wasn't prepared for it, and I didn't see it coming the first time it found us.

We had taken Canon to church a couple of times prior to The Alien Baby's initial arrival. He typically slept through the service, but if he were to awaken, he would simply look around without making a sound. He was always very predictable - eat, play, sleep, repeat. This cycle was broken on Saturday, April 18, 2009, as we sat in a church pew awaiting the marriage vows of our friends, Matt and Rebecca.

As usual, we arrived at the church just before the service began. There was soft music playing and people being seated. It was quiet but not completely silent. The mothers were eventually escorted to their seats, followed closely by the bridal party. If you've ever been to a wedding, you know that there is a very brief period of time between the bridesmaids and the bride when the music stops playing and the bride is preparing to make her big entrance. It is completely silent for maybe three seconds before the trumpets roll to announce the beginning of this sacred ceremony. It was during this three second lull that The Alien Baby first struck our family.

As I twisted in my seat to get a clear view of the main doors as they opened to reveal the beautiful bride, Canon let out a scream so shrill that my heart stopped beating. There was no warning. No soft fussing to let me know he was a bit uncomfortable. No muffled "wah" to prepare me. There was only crying - loud, forceful, look-at-me crying. As I grabbed the diaper bag and headed out the side door, I caught a glimpse of Rebecca's first step down the aisle. I was mortified, but Rebecca swears she never heard a sound. The Alien Baby stayed in my sweet and innocent son until the wedding ended, but left just in time for the reception, during which there would have been enough noise to drown out its terrible cries.

The Alien Baby appeared again the very next day when we attended church and took Canon with us as usual. We attend a contemporary service that is lead by a loud and energetic praise band. The band was playing the opening songs when we arrived, and Canon slept through the next several minutes of bass, electric guitars, and drums. When the music stopped, however, and the preacher took the stage, The Alien Baby once again slithered into my son to cause yet another scene. Apparently, it strikes most often in moments of complete silence when it is difficult to smother the heart-wrenching sounds.

Since that weekend, The Alien Baby has returned on only a few occasions, usually in the car on a long roadtrip when it is impossible to hold and console Canon. Or on a weekend night when all of our friends have come over to relax. Barry and I are getting better at dealing with this Alien Baby. It usually goes away with a quick toss over the shoulder and some pats on the back. A bottle has also proven to get rid of it. It must not like the formula we use!
In case you don't believe me, here are some pictures of when The Alien Baby took over.

No comments:

Post a Comment