I am almost embarrassed to even write about Barry's first Father's Day. It did not go at all as I had planned, but somehow we were both amazingly happy at the end of the day. I had had many thoughts in the previous week of how I wanted this day to go. After all, a man only gets one First Father's Day, and I wanted this day to be perfect for Barry. I tried to put aside everything that I wanted for him and tried to think about what he would want.
So Barry went to the grocery store, cooked dinner, and cleaned up afterwards. Who was this man, and where was my husband? As you can imagine, it ended up being a perfect day despite my incessant, yet poor planning. Barry did exactly what he wanted
to do, which I was surprised to find was not hanging out with his buddies. People always say that life changes after you have children. I guess I thought they mostly meant that the eating out, late nights with friends, and frequent weekend trips would stop. But those things haven't changed at all for us. Instead, I think the biggest change is turning those things down - only every once in awhile - to privately enjoy our new trio.
Besides Canon and myself, what Barry loves more than an
ything else is hanging out with all of his friends. They can be doing anything from playing basketball in 100 degree heat to making new trails for the mini-bike we acquired when Canon was a mere week old. (That's a whole different story that I might find the patience to write later!). You may have already read that we recently moved into our new house just across the street from a beautiful park. It's great for kids with swings and lots of room to just run around, but it's also great for adults because it has horseshoe stakes and a bocci ball "field." Barry and his boys took to these two games immediately. In fact, the second day I was in the hospital after having Canon, Barry went home to take a shower. I called him, oh about three hours later when he still hadn't returned, only to find that he was throwing horseshoes with two of his buddies. My point is, he loves these two games. So, I thought maybe a Bocci Ball / Horseshoe Tournament would be a great idea for his first Father's Day. I imagined the guys in their polo shirts, shorts, and flip-flops concentrating deeply on each toss while the women ran back and forth from the house, refreshing drinks and keeping themselves cool (my imagination was obviously stuck in the 1950's at that particular moment!). There would be a huge bracket that I would have drawn perfectly and set up on an easle so the guys could read it easily. It would list each of Barry's friends and who they would play and when, all narrowing down to one Bocci Ball / Horseshoe Champion. There might even be a trophy!!!
ything else is hanging out with all of his friends. They can be doing anything from playing basketball in 100 degree heat to making new trails for the mini-bike we acquired when Canon was a mere week old. (That's a whole different story that I might find the patience to write later!). You may have already read that we recently moved into our new house just across the street from a beautiful park. It's great for kids with swings and lots of room to just run around, but it's also great for adults because it has horseshoe stakes and a bocci ball "field." Barry and his boys took to these two games immediately. In fact, the second day I was in the hospital after having Canon, Barry went home to take a shower. I called him, oh about three hours later when he still hadn't returned, only to find that he was throwing horseshoes with two of his buddies. My point is, he loves these two games. So, I thought maybe a Bocci Ball / Horseshoe Tournament would be a great idea for his first Father's Day. I imagined the guys in their polo shirts, shorts, and flip-flops concentrating deeply on each toss while the women ran back and forth from the house, refreshing drinks and keeping themselves cool (my imagination was obviously stuck in the 1950's at that particular moment!). There would be a huge bracket that I would have drawn perfectly and set up on an easle so the guys could read it easily. It would list each of Barry's friends and who they would play and when, all narrowing down to one Bocci Ball / Horseshoe Champion. There might even be a trophy!!!Do you know how fast time flies when you have a new baby, you don't have to work for the whole summer, and you have three other friends with brand new babies who are also not working? Let me tell you, it is easy to lose yourself in the fun of it all and concentrate solely on how perfect everything is. Needless to say, Father's Day quickly approached, and I had not so much as bought a piece of posterboard to draw my perfect bracket, much less invited friends over or bought refreshments. Sadly, Barry's first Father's Day was not going to involve horseshoes, bocci balls, or all of his friends.
I decided then that I would make his day the next most perfect da
y I could think of and just let him choose what he wanted to do. I imagined he would be gone most of the day, either working out or rounding up a group of boys to do something creative. They'd probably go swimming or play basketball, and I would stay home and clean out the garage - something I have been meaning to tackle since we moved in and something Barry has mentioned on more than one occasion that he would like to see done. This would be the second-most-perfect Father's Day.
y I could think of and just let him choose what he wanted to do. I imagined he would be gone most of the day, either working out or rounding up a group of boys to do something creative. They'd probably go swimming or play basketball, and I would stay home and clean out the garage - something I have been meaning to tackle since we moved in and something Barry has mentioned on more than one occasion that he would like to see done. This would be the second-most-perfect Father's Day. I woke up early, determined to follow through with my plan. I got myself and Canon ready for church, then woke Barry up to get himself ready while we went on to church for an early reception. Sleeping late: 1 point.
That was the last point I earned all day.
After church, Barry came home and mowed the yard, though I assured him I would do it. We then went to Josh and Mary's and swam for a couple of hours (OK, maybe that earned me another point). Then Barry dropped Canon and me off at home while he went to the grocery store so that he could cook us something for dinner. Two things you should know here: Barry despises spending money on groceries when he can go out to eat for a much less expense (or so he thinks), and he rarely wants to eat at home because it's so much fun to go out to dinner. Again, I told him I could do all of this, but he wanted to do it. I gave in. It was his day, after all, so who was I to argue with what he wanted to do.
So Barry went to the grocery store, cooked dinner, and cleaned up afterwards. Who was this man, and where was my husband? As you can imagine, it ended up being a perfect day despite my incessant, yet poor planning. Barry did exactly what he wanted
to do, which I was surprised to find was not hanging out with his buddies. People always say that life changes after you have children. I guess I thought they mostly meant that the eating out, late nights with friends, and frequent weekend trips would stop. But those things haven't changed at all for us. Instead, I think the biggest change is turning those things down - only every once in awhile - to privately enjoy our new trio. 
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