Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Familiar Tera-tory

Today marks the five-year anniversary of Tera Morris' death. For those of you who don't know the whole story, I'll give you the short version. Or the shortest version I'm willing to give :).
A year after graduating from college, I decided that I needed to go back. My grandmother had graciously left my siblings and I a large sum of money when she died, so I did what any responsible twenty-three-year-old would. I quit my job and re-enrolled in college to become a teacher. While the sum was large, it wasn't quite large enough to handle rent, tuition, food, bills, etc. etc. I was home one weekend in October and mentioned to my dad the idea of getting a part-time job. He was always very generous when it came to our education, but I was really trying to do this on my own.
I returned to Birmingham on Sunday, and a couple of days later I was sitting in a friends' apartment. I mentioned my job hunt situation, and he mentioned a way to fix it. He was/is a teacher at Simmons Middle School in the Hoover City System, and they had just enrolled a new 6th grade student - Tera. Tera had a brain tumor. Diagnosed years before, the tumor had begun affecting her physically only in the last several months. She spent most of the previous summer and the beginning of that school year at St. Jude in Memphis. Her doctors decided that in addition to her digressing physical abilities, her emotional and social well-being was also taking a downward turn. She needed to be with friends. She was allowed to come back home and return to school, but she would need help.
I interviewed for the job that week and started work on Friday. It's amazing how things work out when you let God take care of it. I know everything in life is a "God Thing." But this was one of the more obvious God Things I have ever experienced.
Tera and I got off to an easy start, though there were a few kinks we had to work out. For example, at 5'4" I was about the same size as many of Tera's classmates. Though significantly taller than Tera, it was easy for us to get a little too comfortable with each other, and there were times when we had to re-establish our teacher/student relationship. Though we both knew it wasn't really that. It was much more mutual than that. We were not quite sisters, not quite mother-daughterish, but it definitely felt like family. We both learned from each other, and we definitely loved each other very much. We were, literally, attached at the hip.
Barry and I got engaged that year, and we made plans to move to Dothan. I would have to leave Tera after only a few months. Tera came down with her mother and two of her teachers to attend the wedding. She sat with my guest book and charmed all of our friends. She even stole a dance with my husband, who later said she was heavier than she looks!
Tera started a new year in seventh grade. Though things just got physically worse for her, I'm assured her strong, sweet spirit never faltered. She was readmitted to St. Jude for several days that October, and I drove up to surprise her. Over the next couple of months, she attended school less and spent more time at home with her family. She got to do some of her favorite things in those last few weeks. She and her friends spent an afternoon at Kay jewelers getting "gussied up." She scrapbooked with her mother. All of the things she wanted to do. Her mother told me that the morning she died, everyone was there with her - her mother, father, sister, and brother. It was beautiful, just like Tera.
That day, I was observing at an elementary school in Dothan. When I left the school, I had two messages, both from Birmingham friends who had "news." I waited until I got home to listen. I knew what they were about. When I pulled into my driveway, I was already in tears. There were two rosebuds blooming on the bush just outside the garage. I only noticed because it seemed so strange to me that roses would bloom in December. (I now know that the unusual part is that there were only two roses on the bush. There are usually many more than that in December). When the messages confirmed what I already knew, I decided that I needed a pick-me-up, so I cut the two rosebuds and put them in a vase in my house. A few days later, at Tera's funeral, I would learn that there is a connection between Tera's name - Teresa - and roses. I have never prided myself on being a good listener (especially in church) and I kick myself daily for not storing the words spoken during that particular funeral service in my long-term memory. So I won't even attempt to regurgitate what was spoken by the priest that day. I will just say that it was what I needed to hear then, and when we built our new house, I put in some extra rosebushes.
That was five years ago. One week from today, I will go to my second doctor's appointment. I will only be 15 weeks pregnant, but I will find out on that day that I am having a little girl. And her name will be Tera.

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