Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Why Won't My Children Eat?

Day of Life: 63

Canon woke Lydia up about 6:00 this morning. By the time I realized his crying wasn't part of my dream, she was working on getting him in bed with her. He ended up coming with me and fell asleep in my bed watching Veggie Tales. When I woke him up about 8:30 to get ready for OLS, I could tell he was having a rough day. Every little thing upset him, and all he wanted to do was sit on the couch and continue watching Veggie Tales. He usually acts like this when he doesn't feel good, but he didn't seem to have a fever.

When we arrived at OLS about half an hour later, his fussiness only got worse. He wouldn't get out of his carseat, and after I finally pried him away, he wouldn't walk away from the car until he had his blanket. Once in the building, he wrapped his arms around my neck and would not let go. OLS is having Spring pictures taken today, so one of his teachers walked with us to that room, thinking that maybe he would do better if I was with him. I assured her that I would only make it worse, so instead we walked to the kitchen to get some coffee. Eventually, his teacher just reached out and took him away from me, so I was able to make a quick escape. I assumed he would get over it quickly. but he's never acted this desperate to stay with me before.

I went to the hospital right away. When I made the usual late night call to the nurse last night, she had not had a chance to weigh Tera yet. So, when I walked in this morning, I was so excited to see this on her board:

Yay! 5 pounds 1 ounce! Lots of babies are born full-term weighing around this much. Tera's cousin, Ceil, was 5 pounds 8 ounces and was born at about the gestational age (35 weeks) that Tera is now. It's always good for her to be as full-term as possible.



The doctors came around while I was behind my pumping curtain. We call that area Oz, and I'm The Wizard when I have to pull it shut. Yet again they said that Tera was doing great. I asked them about Tera needing to start laying on her back more often. Once she's in a crib, she will no longer be able to lay on her belly. While on her back, her arms are working against gravity. I have discussed with Michele about the importance of keeping her arms tucked in to her chest to prevent any muscular damage to her back. The doctors said not to worry about any of that while Tera is still in her Isolette. She's fine to sleep on her stomach as long as she is in the Isolette, and laying on her back just a few hours off and on each day won't do any muscular damage to her arms and back.



After they left and I finished pumping, the nurse came back in. Because it's kind of odd to talk to doctors from behind a curtain, the nurse said she would get Tera's pediatrician to come back around to talk to me again. You might remember that last week, we thought that Tera would be in a crib by now, but it looks like it's going to happen next week, if that. I know Tera is not getting worse, but I just wanted a little more information about it all.



When the pediatrician arrived, I inferred from our conversation that I had probably been a little too hopeful that the crib was so close in our future. I don't think that was ever her intention. I really like Tera's pediatrician here. She takes a lot of time to really explain every little thing about whatever you want to know. In our case today, I needed to know more about the Isolette. She calls it The Box, so that's how I'll refer to it now. Basically, babies grow faster in The Box. In The Box, Tera's temperature is regulated for her. This way, all of the calories she eats can go toward helping her brain to develop instead of being burned to keep her warm. Brain development is the key to pretty much everything moving slowly with Tera. Her brain controls her heartbeat, her breathing awareness, her bottle feeding. Everything. In the womb, babies' brains don't need to do all of these things, so it is no wonder that Tera's brain has not fully developed all of these functions yet. Once it has developed as it should, she'll quit having de-sats and bradies. Her suck-swallow-breathe pattern will become more natural, and she'll start taking her bottles more easily.



The pediatrician makes decisions much more slowly than some of the other doctors and nurses here, and especially in our case, I think that's a great thing. No need for Tera to bounce back and forth from Isolette to crib and back because she was never ready to be in the crib in the first place. I was originally told that Tera would only have to take half of her feeds with a bottle before going into a crib, but this doctor likes for her babies to take all of their feeds via a bottle (no feeding tube). It just goes back to the brain development I discussed earlier. If Tera hasn't mastered that function, then her brain needs the extra calories to help it grow.



Another thing we discussed were vaccinations. I think I just assumed that Tera would get her 2-month vaccinations when she was supposed to be two months old, but I was informed today that these would probably be happening soon. The pediatrician explained that Tera will get five or six (I can't remember exactly) vaccinations over the course of a few days. Most of them won't affect her at all, but the DTap (Diphtheria Tetanus Pertussin) shot is what gives most babies fits. If she's going to get sick from any of the shots, it's probably going to be this one. For this reason, she wants Tera to be as stable as possible and, if possible, still in the The Box. That way, if the vaccine does negatively effect her (i.e., she needs more oxygen) it will be easier to just pump it into The Box than to give her continuous blow-by in a crib. Right now, the plan is to see how Tera is doing at the end of the week. If she's still on Room Air and holding steady on Friday, we'll probably try the DTaP shot and see how she does over the weekend. If by the beginning of next week, she seems to have tolerated it well, we'll make a plan for giving her the other vaccinations.



Barry, of course, will be here this weekend, so please pray that she tolerates this first vaccine well, if for no other reason than to not scare her Daddy.




After our conversation, I felt much better about Tera not rushing into a crib. I think I was worried that if she didn't make it into a crib soon, then something was not developing correctly when in fact, we're just making sure that everything does develop correctly before we ever make that decision.



I gave Tera her 11:30 bottle, and she continued her practice of being a "normal preemie." No Rock Star today. I kept her out to hold her while the rest of her meal went through her tube. She's been really great about not de-satting too much while I hold her, even around meal time. She was behaving similarly today, so when I heard her monitors beep, I didn't rush too much to get her blow-by. It was probably just another minor de-sat. When I did look at the monitors just a couple of seconds later, I saw her heartrate number blinking, too. This means that her heartrate has either dropped or increased. Since she was fast asleep, I deduced that it had dropped. The waves on the monitor were spread further apart than usual, a sure sign that she had, in fact, Bradied. Her oxygen saturation was getting lower and lower, so I adjusted her head (to make sure it was upright so that air could get through easily) and held the blow-by close to her face. Her nurse ran in immediately and looked at her. I knew Tera was a little pale, but she's done that before. Her saturation continued to drop, now in the 20s and teens. Surely it would just be a second before she gets pink again. The nurse very politely said, "Let me try something," and she grabbed Tera and jolted her up in the air. Tera immediately started crying, color flooded her face, and her monitors settled down.



It all only lasted a few seconds, but that was long enough for me to register every little detail of what happened. When it was over, I was surprisingly glad that I was holding her when this happened. I've never seen Tera brady before, so I had no idea what the nurses do when that happens. Now I know, and I won't just hold the blow-by at her face next time. The nurse told me that Tera was "clamping down." In other words, she was holding her breath. I was a little embarrassed that I couldn't see that, but I'll know to watch more closely next time.



The rest of the day was much calmer than this first half. I left in the late afternoon to pick up Canon. I found out that he had been a perfect child as soon as I left. He quit crying immediately and did a great job getting his picture taken. He even helped out the photographer by entertaining one child while he took a picture of a different one. I think I might bring out the worst in him sometimes.



This was proven yet again when we got back to Lydia's. I fixed Canon chicken fingers and added a few pieces of cheese. He used to love cheese but hasn't been great about eating it lately. Once he finished his chicken, I told him he needed to eat at least three pieces of cheese before he could get down to play. He refused over and over, and I eventually I let him down (probably a big mistake), but I still wouldn't let him play until he ate his cheese. He was completely unwilling to budge on his decision not to eat it. I eventually lowered it to one piece of cheese (another mistake), and, not surprisingly, he continued to refuse. I turned off the TV and moved all of his toys to the kitchen table so that he couldn't reach them. He cried for awhile, and at some point I just began ignoring him. I'm not sure when it happened, but at some point it became less about the cheese and more about the principal of him not whining his way into getting his way. I remember looking at him and saying "You are not going to win" and knowing that I really meant it. Before too much longer, I told him to eat his cheese or we were going to take a bath and go to bed. He still refused, so I scooped him up and headed upstairs.



"No! No! Cheese" he cried, so we went back downstairs. He grabbed the piece of cheese but wouldn't put it in his mouth. I took him right back upstairs, stripped his clothes off (despite the great fight he put up) and gave him the fastest bath he's ever had. He usually likes to play during Bath Time, but tonight was all business. Once he was back out and dressed for bed, I told him that if he didn't eat one piece of cheese, he was going straight to bed. Once back downstairs, I got a fresh piece of cheese. He looked at it for just a few seconds but finally decided to chew it once I put it in his mouth. I don't know if I really "won," but I do think he learned that when Mom says "If you don't do _____, then I'm going to do _______," she means it. This probably could have been better avoided if I never took him out of his chair. I guess we both learned a lesson tonight.



After the Cheese Battle, Canon and Lydia got out all of his trains and played on the floor. Lydia has really taken the place of Barry in all of this. This is exactly what he usually does at the end of the day - keep Canon entertained while I be the wife and mom. I'm not sure if Lydia really meant to sign up for all of this, but she's really good at it.






What About Barry
I was much better about leaving Barry alone today. I don't want to be the reason he is held up from coming to visit. I was able to talk to him for awhile about the nursery situation again. He was planning to move a lot of furniture around based on the conversation we had during my anxiety attack on Sunday. After discussing it tonight, we realized how ridiculous it is to completely swap their two rooms. Instead, we'll keep the nursery where it is and move Canon into the Guest Room. That way, he can move back to Tera's room when we have guests, and Barry doesn't have to swap so much furniture so quickly. I'm still trying to think of fun things we can do while he is here during the day. Maybe something outside . . .

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